GROANER’S CORNER:(( t was Christmas Eve in at the Supermarket meat counter and a woman was anxiously picking over the last few remaining turkeys in the hope of finding a large one. In desperation she called over a shop assistant and said, 'Excuse me. Do these turkeys get any bigger?' 'No, madam, 'he replied, 'they're all dead.'
Q: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
A: Because he had low elf esteem.
Q: What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?
A: Ribbon hood.
What's red and white and black all over? Santa Claus after he slid down the chimney.
How do snowmen get around? On their icicles.